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| 7 |
Shanghainese Girl Marrying Foreigners I didn't say there is anything wrong to date westerners. What's wrong is the westerners knowing full well they are taking advantage of the niave and eager chinese girls but date them anyway. They know their pockets and passports are the shining stars that shadows their inability to score young girls back home. What's wrong is the chinese girls knowing full well their desire of better-off life without hard work, shut themselves in the bedroom, typing on the keyboard all night long, posting their beautified pictures and pretend to be loving and sweat, ,or hanging out in the western bar, dress sexy and pretend to be wild and open... It is just wrong that those Chinese girls who won't date Chinese guys and only make themselves to whoever westerners. |
| 6 |
Shanghainese Girl Marrying Foreigners It seems I am the only negative voice here. "Girls start to date with westerners since 20 year old. There are two types of westerners. One looking for true love, the other play with Chinese girls...." That is the chinese girls' expereince and knowledge about their western dating counter part.... Does that prove my point? Any pro-western dating people out there? Hello???? |
| 5 |
Shanghainese Girl Marrying Foreigners For the type of temporary relationship or romance game, who has the upper hand? The foreign man or the local girl? If real feelings occur, who has more to loose? Boy always likes to play and girl eventually wants to find that special someone. Some girls might not act that way by being open minded or so called "xiao sa". Whatever her attitude is, most Chinese girls or women still hold very traditional core by the way they are raised and how the society expect them to be. Some foreign men claimed to "help" the Chinese women break out of the shell, or liberate them from their closed society, but seldom can follow through. Most of them only stay at the level of learning the language, knowing the culture, enrich their life experience. They get what they want from those "brave" Chinese girls, when it is time for them to put real effort, they withdraw, leaving the girls hanging there. Then they move on with a few cheers for the sufferring Chinese ex-lovers' strenghth to carry on. I won't encourage any Chinese girl to go for this kind of risky game until oneday, Chinese can travel freely to those foreign countries, until oneday, Chinese women are not stereotyped as exotic, submissive, sweet, cute, until oneday that Chinese no longer consider white skin, big nose as higher class. |
| 4 |
Shanghainese Girl Marrying Foreigners If it is always a happy ending, everybody is happy, what is the problem? Of course I am not saying ALL international romance is bad. Obviously AussiPB is a good example. But like you said, your case is one of the rare ones. I wonder whether you witness of heard of the bad case like mine. What most people in your circle do about it? NOTHING? They might shoot their heads, say bad bad bad and then forget about it. But think about those eager hopeful girls and women, how much harder for them to believe in another man or especially a foreign man? How can they put their feet on the same ground as other Chinese women who did not enjoy the same benefit of being with a foreign men? How a young girl who received so much by sleeping with a rich older guy can make anything for herself? How can she be able to date a regular Chinese boy after all those years believing she is going to live in US in a comfortable life? You do know being with a foreign man is kind of higher class among regular Chinese. Anybody to blame for those bad case of foreign-romance-goes-bad? Also I notice most foreign men who are interested in Chinese women usually discriminate against or look down on Chinese men. Maybe in a way they use this to justify that no matter how bad they took advantage or exploite the Chinese women, they were actually doing them a favor to liberate them from the control of Chinese small men? About how warm and welcomed Chinese women are treated oversea in Aussi's case, I don't think it explains anything for the issues we are talking about here. Sometimes I wonder why those international companies would not do anything to stop their employees exploitation to the locals. Maybe in many ways, some of those big western business practice is another form of colonisation. Believe it, I have seen plenty of this. And you wonder why the westerners, especially the American are so much hated by the people of the third world countries? Compare to the western expats, the Chinese men are much more displined. They are welcomed and accepted by the locals. |
| 3 |
Shanghainese Girl Marrying Foreigners Of course I am saying ALL international romance is bad. Obviously AussiPB is a good example. But like you said, your case is one of the rare ones. I wonder whether you witness of heard of the bad case like mine. What most people in your circle do about it? NOTHING! They might shoot their heads, say bad bad bad and then forget about it. But think about those eager hopeful girls and women, how much harder for them to keep on their lives being in another man or especially a foreign man. How can they put their feet on the same ground as other Chinese women did not enjoy the same benefit of being with a foreign men. You do know being with a foreign man is kind of higher class among regular Chinese. Anybody to blame for those bad case of foreign-romance-goes-bad? Also I notice most foreign men who are interested in Chinese women usually discriminate against or look down on Chinese men. Maybe in a way they use this to justify that no matter how bad they took advantage or exploite the Chinese women, they were actually doing them a favor to liberate them from the control of Chinese small men? About how warm and welcomed Chinese women are treated oversea in Aussi's case, I don't think it explains anything for the issues we are talking about here. If it isalways a happy ending, everybody is happy, what is the problem? Sometimes I wonder why those international companies would not do anything to stop their employees exploiting the local. Maybe in many ways, some of those big western business practice is another form of colonisation. And believe it, I have seem plenty of this around me. Compare to the western expats, the Chinese men are much more displined and welcomed and accepted by the locals. |
| 2 |
Shanghainese Girl Marrying Foreigners There is difference between the local bad man and the foreign bad man. The American man would not have the same liberal to do what he did to the Chinese in America. Also we need to see the fact that he is actually invited by those Chinese women. And he is glad to go there for the feast because those women all want him to fall in love by using their weapon of being exotic, good Chinese woman, sex, being nice, soft, tender, intellegent, loyal... whatever the good chinese woman quality portrayed by the out side world. But in fact, are they (chinese women) really possess such virtues? Do notice they are all college educated women. At least one woman is not so loyal to her Chinese husband. So if we judge by the conent of their characters, are the Chinese so innocent? There is inherent flaw in international romance between rich and poor countries no matter how strongly some people deny the unfairness between the two parties. Is there realy such a sharp line between the good foreigner and the bad ones? Do you sincerely think that you didn't take advantage of having a white face, a foreigner passport and the expat benefit package??? By the way, it is a real story. I did not copy from anywhere. |
| 1 |
Shanghainese Girl Marrying Foreigners Here is a real story. An old (59) American business guy met a young Chinese college girl (21) from the country side on line and "fell in love". She invited him to visit her and gave her virginity to him in a five star hotel. He told her he would not marry her from the beginning. But she took him anyway. The scene was brutal: he is 194 cm 150 kilogram 60 year old senior and she is 142 cm and 40 kilo 22 young junior. After this, they went on almost one tour per year around China and the old guy is absolutely in love with China. It is kind of a relationship. He bought her and her family a big and nice flat. Support her and her siblings finishing college, send them clothes, gifts, money... No wonder she bought him home the second trip he went to China and introduced him to her parents, sisters... Her family just loved him and looked up to him. She was dreaming and getting herself ready to go visit him in the state once she would finish her master degree and marry him and give him babies... Little she knows, he is not such Mr. right after all, the first trip, the first place they met, the five star hotel, he actually slept with another middle aged married Chinese woman who actually paid her own flight and booked the hotel for the meeting. The same trip, before arriving China, he slept with two other young girls in Indonisia. And the whole time he was supporting her and her family, he has his dirty mind on her sisters and even her mother. His own American family knows about his Chinese women adventure. They were all discussed by his act but puzzled by how those Chinese women would let him do this to them. But the real thing I don't understand is all those women in China he could somehow keep a long term relatinship with and they were all faithful to him and hoping one day they would go to the US visit him or he would come visit and stay with them. That poor middle aged woman even divorced her husband and kept herself for him for 3 years until one day she found out she contracted STD from him. Same as the poor girl. In the end, he got married, but not with any of them and all the romance went cold turkey because his new wife found out about it. And those poor Chinese women had no idea what happened after endless desperate effort to contact him. So sad story? As a Chinese woman myslef, I really don't understand. Worst of all, I married this man who is 27 years older than I and I really really love him. |